While Dorothy and I were in the car- this past Saturday -she turns to me at a stop light and says
“Cheryl, I know why old people are so angry all the time”
Why?
“Because they are old- and they can’t do things that young people can, and it makes them sad- then they get mad. So, that’s why we are grumpy-I don’t like getting old”
I smiled at her and said- “I totally understand mom”
I do really! There are things that I can’t do today that -I could do 5 years ago. But, I’m not mad about it-( well maybe a little) – I still have my freedom and there’s a ton of stuff that I like to do- that I can still do.
I can see how being old and grumpy goes hand in hand. When I was younger all the old people I knew were grumpy (except for my Gran Ella). And to be honest- when I was really young, I was afraid of them and I didn’t want to be around them. One of my weekly chores was to walk up to granny’s house-get her grocery list and go to the store for her.. I would not like it one bit-for me it was very creepy. She was old, wrinkled, hard of hearing. She wore thick coke bottle glasses that made her eyes look like they were popping out of her head. When I would return from the store, she would ask me to stay and visit. I must confess that I did not stick around very often- I was ready to get out of the scary place- and get back to playing. On the few occasions that I did stay -she asked the same thing- how old are you? What grade are you in? What’s your name? Where do you live? I couldn’t understand why she didn’t know who I was or what my name was. It was pretty intimidating for a little kid. Granny raised my mom- I’m sure she had some wonderful stories.
The lyrics by Rod Stewart “I wish that I knew then what I know now” ( Ooh La La) is pretty accurate as I reflect back on situations and options in my life. I wish now that I’d have known to asked her questions and listed to her stories. But most of all- I wonder what hersong was- I wonder if it would have been like Dorothy’s?
The saying “youth is wasted on the young” is so true- especially the older I get. Stay away from that rear-view mirror some of it is an iceberg of regrets- and we don’t need to dwell on those. Over time, they will melt.
Embrace the journey you are on -in all areas of your life!
If you go against the flow- you won’t enjoy the float.
Peace & Love,
Cheryl Doreen
Dorothy's Dementia 