Medications- changes-fear-confinement-loneliness-uncertainty- awareness- loss -helpless-memories- confusion. Going through this journey with mom I know for a fact that she is feeling all of these things. They can’t seem to get Dorothy’s meds right, there are too many changes going on right now around her. She’s afraid of what is happening to her. She feels confined- not being able to go outside. She feels all alone. Dorothy’s immediate future is uncertain. At times she’s aware that all these things are happening to her. The loss of mind which leads to the loss of self. The feeling of helplessness must be so painful. The memories that are surfacing and playing tricks on her mind have to be driving her crazy. Total confusion- how could all of this happen to her?
With the epidemic I feel helpless- totally-I don’t like the feeling of not being able to fix it- or make it better. Do I let them put her in memory care where she is? Do I find a different facility for her? Everything is about to change anyway- why not do a drastic change? Does it really matter where she is? We can’t visit anyway.
It’s like the perfect storm of disaster for Dorothy:
The Covid 19 shuts down the world
The family she has known for two years is broken up due to a buyout
The new company has fired key people without having anyone in place
Numerous people have left due to the firing or the fear of being fired next
Her medication is failing and the adjustment to find the solution is not as quick as they thought
Sooner or later it’s going to blow and I could be the one that blows
I’ve been on the phone this morning to another facility- with an open concept to memory care- fresh air and sunshine- left message
I’ve been on the phone to the home office for the facility that mom is in currently- left message
I’ve been on the phone to the head nurse where mom is- left message
As of yet no one has called me back-but it’s only 9:30 I’m sure the phone will start ringing soon.
Love and Light!
Cheryl Doreen
Dorothy's Dementia 
I’m keeping you in my prayers asking you be given wisdom, guidance and light to weather this tsunami. COVID has made everything unfair, difficult and at some times seemingly impossible. Trust in your instincts, your heart and yourself. You will do what’s best for your mom through your love for her.
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