Moms outing on Monday was really good. Even though it was cloudy and grey -she was very happy to get outside. We went to Mexican for lunch and sat for almost 2 hours eating and visiting. She wanted desert and I let her decide- she picked apple turnovers with ice cream- can’t remember what they are called at a Mexican Restaurant. I cannot do cinnamon or ice cream, so I did not have any. When the waiter brought it out, I couldn’t believe how huge it was! It was big enough for a family of four- to share. Her eyes were as wide as my grandsons when we get desert at a restaurant. She acted just like the two of them , she couldn’t get enough of it. I literally had to take the plate away after she ate two turnovers and two scoops of ice cream.
I know they do not give them much sugar where she is- and I did not want her getting sick. She actually begged me to let her have more LOLOL all I could do was laugh.
She was in good spirits the entire day and I kept her mind occupied with questions, so- she did not dwell on the “when can I go home” questions. When she did ask about “when can I go home “? I answered it like always- explaining to her why and also asking her a few questions of where we were and what we just did. She of course- couldn’t answer them. So, I said “mom, this is why you are in memory care, you can’t remember what just happened a few moments ago”. She actually laughed and replied “ Cheryl, I can’t remember anything”. At this point I asked her ”mom, what is on your brain right now, what is the first thing that comes to your mind, or a memory of yours you can share” – she looked at me strangely and replied “ I don’t have any memories and I don’t have anything in my brain.” Sigh!
So, I asked her what she did when she was 10- she told me a few stories that I had heard before and a new one that I hadn’t heard. She went on to tell me there was a family member, a man- who would come over with his wife and crippled son. She said that he would pretend to “play around” with Delores and I -but, what he was actually doing was feeling our breasts. I was shocked! I asked her how many times this happened and if she ever told anyone about it. She said that it happened about 6 times- then she would never get close to him after that- she said that she couldn’t tell anyone, because they wouldn’t believe her- he was such an outstanding man and a very good husband and father. It made me stop and think how many times this still happens today to both boys and girls and the fact that they are afraid to speak out for the same reason.
The doctor’s appointment was great- her feet are good, as is the circulation- the doctor trimmed her toenails- which haven’t’ been cut since November- when I did them- for some reason due to covid they do not cut them at the home anymore. Another one of those “Help me understand why”.
I pray the covid will leave this month- as quick as it came last year at this time and we can all get back to what “normal” was for everyone. I know it will not be the same as it was- but hopefully the elderly, children and abused humans will be able to get out, feel more loved and possibly get out of the situation they’ve been tied into for the last 12 months and maybe brave enough to say something to someone. I just hope whoever they tell takes it for fact and helps them.
Love, Light, Peace & Love,
Cheryl Doreen
Dorothy's Dementia 